Daily Mood Quote - August 25, 2011

 

Daily Mood Quote

Day 114 – August 25, 2011

“And the only thing that matters, Is climbing up that social ladder, Still care about your hair and the car you drive. Doesn't matter if you’re 16 or 35”

~Bowling for Soup,- High School Never Ends

Today I chose a song lyric from High School Never Ends as the quote of the day. Recently, I attended a back to school night at a local high school. Back to school night is a meet and greet between parents and teachers, along with a brief introduction to the administration staff. I was astounded by how many parents took it literally and dropped back into their high school roles. And in some cases acted as juvenile as their kids. I would guess the average age of the parents to be somewhere between late thirties and early forties, with a few stragglers on either side of that age range. The first thing I noticed were short skirts and muscles shirts. Okay I'm guilty of laughing. Maybe, it's me but when you see a woman in her fifties wearing a skirt so short that when she bent over, the world was greeted by both cheeks, “H-E-L-L-O” (thank you Sister Mary Patrick (Kathy Najimy) from Sister Act 2), you've got to wonder what she was thinking. It made me wonder, if I'm aging too fast, or maybe I'm just too conservative, something to think about. Maybe...

What really got to me was the little clique clusters that formed instantaneously, as they stood around and reminisced about their high school days. I heard conversations ranging from where someone got their first kiss (on the second floor, near the woman's bathroom) to where someone lost their innocence...(Eewwwww!, TMI!!!,). I quickly found another place to be. Then their was the high school jocks that stood and stared at their pictures in the trophy case. I kind of felt sorry for those guys because the looks on their faces, where one of disappointment and longing for, “a life unfulfilled” I suppose. Then we had the braggers, those who talked loud enough for everyone to hear about all of their accomplishments and recent vacations, recent purchases and even a recent conquest (since the divorce was final). And there were even the solemn wall flowers winding their way through the halls, literally blending into and sticking as close to the wall as possible, just so nobody noticed. They call that “positive thigmotaxis” I think, at least that's how I remember it from high school biology.

I found myself asking the question, “Where are the grown-ups?” To be fair, there were some and you could tell, there was a big difference between the people who “grew up,” grew up “here” and those who are transplants. The transplants acted and dressed like grown-ups and where completely ignored. The “grown ups” looked as stunned, as I'm certain I did. We even witnessed a hip-check into the hallway wall. Really???

So, “high school never ends”... and I wonder why this behavior is so evident in our culture. Is it because they ascribe deep emotional attachment, or is it that we only remember the good stuff? I think that's a question for a psychiatrist to answer, not me. In the movie The Breakfast Club, Claire Standish (played by Molly Ringwald) said, “Do you know how popular I am? I am so popular. Everybody loves me so much at this school.” there was a lot of that, even decades after they got the diploma and walked out the door. However, in the movie 17 Again, Mike O'Donnell (played by Zac Efron) said, “I had the craziest dream. I was 17. I was back in high school. It was terrible. Mmmm. Scar.” That quote feels a little more on target. Marcus Aurelius said “Our life is what our thoughts make of it.” Apparently. there are many here who think the past is better that the present. It seems as if they are stuck there. Memories are one of the greatest gifts we have, we remember them, we share them with great fondness, however we cannot and should not expect to “relive” them. Choose to look forward not back.

How will you look forward today?

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Daily Mood Quote - August 2, 2011

 

Daily Mood Quote

Day 91 – August 2, 2011

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.

~Henry David Thoreau

When I was a little girl, I kept a journal, a dairy. A place where I could put my thoughts, ideas, dreams, wishes, goals and fears. I loved to write. I had a secret dream in my dairy, something I never told anyone, because I never wanted anyone to crush my dream. Sometimes, my dreams where the only things that got me through a day; especially when my mom was having a bad day.

I wanted to be a writer, make a difference, change the world, add a different perspective, make people think. Unfortunately, my mother found my dairy and everything I had ever thought was now known by her. From wanting to be a nun (I was young) to wanting to change the world as a writer was in that diary. So, from that day forward, she told me; I was a terrible writer, I was stupid and nobody would ever read anything I wrote. She worked very hard to stop me from chasing, or fulfilling my dream as a writer. Did you ever hear the saying, “Tell someone something long enough and enough times, they begin to believe it?' This is what happened to me. For many years, I listened to how stupid I was, how ugly I was and what a terrible person I was. Eventually, I began to believe it. My grades dropped in school, I struggled with friendships, but most importantly; I stopped the one thing that made me feel alive...writing.

Harriet Tubman said, “Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.” It took me a long time to find my way back to writing again. Even in college I struggled the first two years with papers, now in my first year of grad school, I can't seem to shut up and have to watch my word and page count. Even in this blog, I have written varying lengths, some long and some short depending on the mood of the day. 

In the movie Sister Act 2, Rita Watson (played by Lauryn Hill) says to a friend, “my mother thinks singin' is a dead end. No security.” But later in the movie, Sister Mary Clarence (played by Whoopi Goldberg) says to Rita, “I went to my mother. Who gave me this book...called Letters To a Young Poet. Rainer Maria Rilke. He's a fabulous writer. A fellow used to write to him and say: “I want to be a writer. Please read my stuff.” And Rilke says to this guy:”Don't ask me about being a writer. If, when you wake up in the morning, you can think of nothing but writing...then you're a writer.” This was said to Rita to inspire her to read the book and to be the singer she was meant to be. She didn't have her mother's support or blessing, because her mother didn't understand, or didn't want to believe in the talent her daughter possessed, much like my mom didn't believe, or couldn't believe.I'll never really know, we never talked about it.

When we are young, our dreams and talents can be buried under a mudslide of other people's fears, ignorance and the emotional baggage of our family and friends. But like a seed buried under a mudslide, they can reemerge when the weight and pressure is washed away by the gentle rain of passing time. When the dreams surface again, it's then up to us to either nurture and grow them, or to let them lay. Sometimes, they grow anyway and we are compelled to attend to them, until they bear the fruits they were always meant too. I love to write and my husband is a painter and for years, many have tried to squash those talents, but they just keeping growing, bigger, stronger and better. I guess some things are just "meant to be" (thank you Robert from Everybody loves Raymond). Destiny awaits us.

What dreams will come to the surface for you today?

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Daily Mood Quote - August 1, 2011

 

Daily Mood Quote

Day 90 – August 1, 2011

We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light.

~Mary Dunbar

Eleven years ago our world collapse around us. Everything we had worked for was taken away in an instant. At least it seemed like an instant, but was actually “a series of unfortunate events.” First our entire life savings was pilfered by our accountant and at about the same time, business dried up and our remaining clients went from paying in 30 day cycles to 180 day cycles. Then several of them filed bankruptcy at once, leaving us holding the bag for all the expenses. Oh by the way, the ne'er-do-well accountant also had misfiled our tax returns for several years. This was not a happy year for us. Unfortunately, insurance doesn't cover stupid. Actually naive would be a better word, we knew the business, we just didn't “know” business. Trust me there is a big difference between the two.

At the time, we made the only decision we felt we had. We went home after months of pressure from family to come home and be “safe.” What a grave mistake, we took the bait, “hook, line and sinker” (thank you Die Hard with a Vengeance). Needless to say, the family did not have our best interest in mind, they had their own agenda. It would have been better to face the fear than to run from it. We learned nothing by running, at least at that time. Well here we are again, different place, different players but the same game. In the movie Die Hard 2, John McClane (played by Bruce Willis) said, “How can the same s#$% happen to the same guy twice?” I personally believe that when you are faced with the same situation twice in your lifetime, it means you have something to learn from it. So, the question is, do we buckle under the pressure to run and move somewhere else to satisfy our “families” desire to have us safe and in their grasp, or do we stand our ground, work through the problems despite the fear and palpable uncertainty?

In the movie, Sister Act 2, Sister Mary Clarence (played by Whoopi Goldberg) said to her students, “If you wanna go somewhere and you wanna be somebody...you better wake up and pay attention. Because if every time something scary comes up you decide to run...y'all are gonna be runnin' for the rest of your lives.” Moving - running doesn't always yield the best results, if we can't make it here, then what is the guarantee we can make it somewhere else? Eleanor Roosevelt said, “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.” In his classic Sci-Fi book series Dune, Frank Herbert wrote an interesting mantra about fear, “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.” It has been my experience that fear has never made a good life decision. I'm not taking about “getting out of the way of a speeding bus” type fear, but long-term health and welfare decisions. What others think and fear only matters to other people. Not this time fear, not this time.

How will you stand your ground and face “fear” today?

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